I should have known.
Last Thursday I dreamed of a friend. He is a mentor and favourite human. We chatted about our kids. We laughed about how old we were these days. He told me he adored me and then he said something he told me daily when we worked together ten years ago: find what you love, hold tight and enjoy the ride.
I didn't think too much about the dream. I had been perusing his Facebook page before bed. So it made sense to dream of him.
Oh but I should've known better.
You see I have a gift. I dream of the dead. When ever someone I love passes on they visit my dreams. Sometimes it's people I really don't love or even like but yet they come.
I've been this way my whole life. It is a comfort and it's not.
Last week I walked about on edge all day. Like something is missing or the stove was left on. That feeling has followed me for a week.
I thought yesterday it was because I almost forgot to vote. I thought Monday it was because I forgot to buy toilet paper at the store. This weekend I thought it was about open ended plans needing finalized. Friday I thought it was my OCD getting tweaked by my mad neighbor.
Sadly the feeling of unease and restlessness ended abruptly this morning.
I saw on another friends Facebook page that our mutual friend was gone.
And unlike so many who loved him I was given a moment to say goodbye. I was able to tell him I loved him. And unlike so many I know there is a place we travel after death.
How could I not when I have years worth of journals filled with my dreaming. Silent witnesses to final farewells.
So God Speed kind man. Thank you for the dream.